NEL Blog

“Start as you mean to go on”, so the saying goes.

Sometimes you can talk to similar kinds of girls, but it’s like you’re two different people. On some occasions you roll up, bust out your choice line, and it just doesn’t go anywhere. You can feel it, it’s like there’s no energy to the conversation. It’s gone flat.

But then sometimes it’s just pure Harry Potter magic. You say one thing and it’s got her attention straight away, you follow up with something else equally awesome and she’s sold. Then it builds and builds and you’re on fire.

It’s all in how you start the conversation.

Now I’m not talking first impressions here. This is about you and your brain, not her. I’m talking about the kind of vibe you’re starting with.

If you start by asking boring questions/making boring statements, leaving any and all fun out of the conversation to begin with, you’re handicapping yourself, but not for the most obvious reasons. Not only are you handicapping yourself right now, but you’re also handicapping the rest of the conversation with this girl.

You see how you start is how you go on. Going with the above and being boring, your brain picks up on this. It thinks “hmm okay, time to be boring” and everything else you say from this point on is pulled from this side of your brain. Later on when you think of something to say, it’s coming from this boring part of your brain because that’s how you’ve set it up.

Now let’s roll through take two. You catch the eye of some young lovely lady who you’re 90% sure is over 16, and open with one of your best cocky-funny lines. What happens now is you set your brain up a different way, it now think “Alright, time to party!” and you’re now accessing this fun part of your brain.

Basically what you’re doing is starting the conversation the right way, not for her benefit, but for yours. Instead of starting with boring small talk and going down that route, you’re starting with something fun and going down that route instead.

However you start, your brain follows. Always better to set it up the right way (which is why I’m such a fan of pissing around, having fun).

Of course, this is a general rule and not a hard-and-fast one.

For starters, an interaction can always go one way or another. How many times have you started strongly only to mess it up at the least minute? And likewise how many times have you pulled off something awesome from nowhere?

The flow of a conversation can change at any point, and more often than not it’s far from straightforward. Starting a conversation the ‘wrong’ way isn’t a deal breaker, I’d consider it more of a handicap. You can start with boring spiel and do fine, but you’ll tend to get sucked into a boring way of thinking and struggle conversation-wise.

Why make things harder for yourself? If you’re gonna choose between two doors/paths, go for the easier, fun one. Make life that little bit easier for yourself.

Also, much like state, you don’t want to get into a habit of not approaching because things aren’t going the right way. Too often we think “no I’m not state in yet”, and there’s a similar risk with this.

Whatever happens, you still need to do your approaches.

Look, a fun conversation is always better than a boring/standard one, but a boring one is miles better than no conversation, stood with your dick in your hand.

Awesome conversation >> standard conversation >> no conversation >> sitting at home on Face book

One final point.

By “start of the conversation”, I mean in general. I don’t literally mean the first thing that comes out your mouth. I mean early on rather than right away, the earlier you bust out the fun mindset and get it up and running, the easier things will be.

Think of it like kino, the earlier you use it, the better.

That’s all there is to it. Start with the right kind of vibe, and you’ll make what follows that much more easier, fun and awesome.

Author Bio-
Having been a professional bitch of 19 years, Ty discovered the community in 2006. When not drunkenly sleeping with girls from his work, his interests include computer games, movies and colouring-in books. Ty prefers a more natural style of game, with a strong emphasis on fun and a healthy dose of cocky-funny.

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