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Archive for the ‘PUA Profiles’ Category

Here’s the first of the PUA profiles – Stevie PUA.  Stevie has been an NEL member since the beginning, and has been active in the community and in field for a long time; 10 years in fact!   Stevie has kindly written a review of his 10 years of the game for this blog.  Here it is:

 10^th Anniversary Review

It was 10 years ago, in 1997 that I came across the community. My Swedish girlfriend had left me to while away a few hours, during which time she had to attend lessons. It was in this infamous computer room I fucked her on the one of the PC benches. So began a penchant for my girls liking risky sex. We did it on the outdoors balcony in Gothenburg and she blew me on a train, another chick I did over the front of my car, another chick got fingered on a road bridge in Spain. It’s funny to talk about these girls in the past tense, like they are dead or something – they are all very much alive; it’s just that I feel I carry them round inside me – little personality aspects which I have held onto and made them mine because they were touching, affecting – in this case they had an adventurous streak which was very appealing. These characteristics I collected from them were damn useful too. As I recently told my most recent conquest, a tall Czech blonde beauty 10 years younger than me – “I collect people”. By that I mean two things – I try to include quality people in my life. I also mean I collect useful communication strategies I have observed – ways of speaking, mannerisms, gestures, tonalities, ways of thinking, which I see are really effective. I suppose you could call it modelling people or aspects of who they are.

But back to that computer room in Stockholm. I’d been flicking around while my LTR was out of the room (and that is not a euphemism for screwing girls while she studied!). I happened to do a search on ‘seduction’. A click brought me to the Ross Jeffries Speed Seduction website. I won’t go into large amounts of detail about what followed from this, suffice to say that I felt I was coming home – I’d met a group of people who had similar passions to mine. Here was a community of people who wanted to get better at laying girls and generally improve themselves. I’ve written about this episode before, in Tao of Stevie, I think, so I won’t go into explaining my already high interest in NLP and hypnosis (one day I had found a library book signed by Milton Erickson in Stockholm library!).

That website search had not been a lucky strike – I’d been into meeting girls for 10 years previously but I had been on my own up to that point. Sure, I’d laid a dozen chicks or so and kissed hundreds, but it was not until I found the online community that I was able to hone my skills and understandings with any consistency. On the other hand, looking back, I think the community disturbed my game a bit because it was forcing me to be aware of things that had been previously running on autopilot,  and surfing the net kept me in the house on my own a lot more, whereas previously I had been out in the field. I quickly followed up my Speed Seduction studies with in-depth reading and application of Mystery’s teachings and Maniac High’s exploits. Tyler Durden came along and he injected some cockiness into my game, though I had to recalibrate my game once more due to the fun of tilting to extremities.

I travelled. I went all over Europe meeting people from the community. I went to Australia. I gamed people all the time. I did inter rail. I met and lived with a natural in Germany for a year. I lived in Sweden, Spain, Italy, Scotland and Asia. I met Ross, I met Mystery, I met Papa, I met TD, and I met Style. They even said I was cool and had good game. Wow. They saw me blowing hot. But I would, and still do, blow cold. No jokes about BJs (though I got some good ones along the way). I laid girls from all over the world, yet I don’t see myself as all that good. Gaming is such a state dependant skill. Someone recently said to me that gaming is a ‘soft skill’ – one where if you don’t practise it, you lose your sharpness at it. You have to get back into the field and do it if you want to keep or increase your skill level. Anyone who has been in a LTR for a while and has settled into the comfort zone will tell you about this happening. You are getting good sex. You are comfortable. You stop chasing other girls. You stop keeping her on her toes because you have ‘got her’ now. Then you stop getting sex from her because you have become a wimp again. You are no longer the person she liked and was attracted to when you first met. She, as part of her ongoing need for security and for children, slowly beta-ises you (if you let her) and you are left with no LTR and a blunt skill set. A lot of guys in these circumstances get pissed off, angry and say girls are all bitches. You have to guard against this. Keep social!

I have been there and back. I was there recently and am on the rise again. I know myself pretty well and know my faults and strengths. I play to my strengths and try to consciously act to limit my weakness or to avoid getting into situations where my weaknesses could be allowed to exhibit themselves. I tend to become too nice once I am in the comfort zone with a chick. I rarely, if ever, fall out with my girls. We tend to end things amicably most of the time and I hate letting go of them. I am too emotional. I am too sensitive emotionally. I sometimes lack motivation and get into a rut. I know these things about myself. Of course they are also positive things too in the right circumstances. Without my emotional sensitivity I would not be so good at calibrating other people’s moods and unspoken thoughts. Without my wish to display amicable understanding, my rapport game would not be so tight and far fewer of those connections would be genuinely incredible. And without that ability to switch off from the game and step back from it all I would be subject to far more anxiety about having to do things I really don’t want to do. It keeps me in my own reality.

The last ten years have been good and have gone fast. I’ve met some great people, I’ve had some great relationships, and I’ve had great sex and a host of adventures. I’ve also managed to stay true to my principles of being as honest as I can to myself and of being respectful to other people if they deserve it and respect me. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and I see the glass as half-full. I hope I’ll keep improving in the years to come and that I’ll meet more good people along the way. Life is there to be enjoyed, as I see it. It’s about getting the balance right of doing what you want to do without hurting others, of staying true to yourself and what is important to you in terms of your deep values, and it’s about having fun along the way.

I’ve put myself through the ringer in the past simply for the learning experience or to get ahead in the market place. There should be time to reap the rewards you’ve sown too otherwise it is all for nothing – like money you never, ever spend. Outside your door, away from the screen is where the real fun is, so get out there and put your knowledge and skills into practise – turn that paper bill into something you really want.

Stevie PUA. August 2007. England.